HOME RIP-Factor Jokes and Stories

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Actual Subtitles from KUNG-FU Movies


"I am damn unsatisfied to be killed in this way."

"Fatty, you with your thick face have hurt my instep."

"Gun wounds again?"

"Same old rules: no eyes, no groin."

"A normal person wouldn't steal pituitaries."

"Damn, I'll burn you into a BBQ chicken!"

"Take my advice, or I'll spank you without pants."

"Who gave you the nerve to get killed here?"

"Quiet or I'll blow your throat up."

"You always use violence. I should've ordered glutinous rice chicken."

"I'll fire aimlessly if you don't come out!"

"You daring lousy guy."

"Beat him out of recognizable shape!"

"I have been scared sh*tless too much lately."

"I got knife scars more than the number of your leg's hair!"

"Beware! Your bones are going to be disconnected."

"The bullets inside are very hot. Why do I feel so cold?"

"How can you use my intestines as a gift?"

"I am sure you will not mind that I remove your manhoods and leave them out on the dessert floor for your aunts to eat!"

"Yah-hah, evil spiderwoman! I have captured you by the short rabbits and can now deliver you violently to your gynecologist for a thorough extermination."