HOME RIP-Factor StarTrek Jokes

<< Prev

Top 10 Favorite Activites of Capt. Jean-Luc Picard


10. Ordering Earl Grey tea from the computer, then smacking himself on the forehead and saying "I could have had a V-8!"

9. Yelling "Punchbuggy!" and hitting Riker's arm whenever he sees a shuttlecraft

8. Dcrewing around in the holodeck when he ought to be on the bridge

7. Dpotlighting unsuspecting crewmembers with the glare from his forehead

6. Lecturing everybody on why it's rude to fire the phasers at other life-forms

5. Sending crank subspace messages to Starfleet Command asking if Dick Hertz is there

4. Asking Beverly Crusher to come to his quarters so he can show her "a REAL Picard Maneuver"

3. Ticking off Romulan commanders during tense confrontations in the Neutral Zone by asking "Are those Bugle Boy jeans you're wearing?"

2. Telling crewmembers in menacing, Dirty Harry voice, "Go ahead, Make it so"

1. Putting banana peels on the transporter pads just before an away team beams back up