Mike Golden Spoofs
WRITTEN BY: Mike Golden
INTRO BY: joesmaname
Whom Gods Destroy
"Noxious fumes, rocky, too barren to support life of any kind. Bet it's quiet here." "Welcome, grasshopper. So glad you could make it." "Today, class, we're going to learn how to conjugate a verb."
"I literally danced in the street when I heard they were going to start putting english teachers in here." "Doctor, what are you doing?" "Oh, just hanging around."
"Surprise, captain." "You're pretty sneaky for somebody with an upside down triangle on his chest." "Thank you. Just don't tell anyone my secret identity."
"Now, I look just like you. I'm going back to the Enterprise and make it with Yeoman Rand. Ta ta." "I wonder how he changed his clothes like that. And how did he know about Janice?" "Bravo! Blockbuster has nothing over on this. And you don't have to go into a little room to get it."
Sun lights up the daytime,
moon lights up the night.
I light up when you call my name
'cause I know you're gonna treat me right.
You give me fever.
In the morning. Fever when you hold me tight. Fever when you kiss me. Fever all through the night.
"I would give her a standing ovation, Garth, but I might bang my head on
the table."
"Captain, I will afford you the honor
of being the first to pull the finger of Lord Garth the first."
"Give me a break. Garth sounds like a noise you'd make after being stabbed."
"I know how you like green chicks. I'm a member of your message board. How about this one?" "Mmm, you smell like lime."
"Yeah, but she looks like a nice, firm apple from here."
"I'm getting tired of looking at that ugly bastard but I can't change the channel."
"It's horrible."
"Yes, who would have thunk it of the great James T. Kirk?"
"Now, a bit of the old soft shoe. Music, maestro." "Hmm, it would appear as though the janitor has missed a spot."
"Shoot him, Spock."
"Shoot him, Spock."
"My mama told me there'd be days like this."
"Quick! Shoot him, Spock. My girdle's about to break." "Why am I in this chair?" "You weren't thinking in a way that was socially acceptable so we loaded you with mind altering drugs."
"Mr. Spock, do we have any limes onboard. I have a hankering for a nice, firm, juicy one."