RIP-Factor
StarCrap
RIP-Factor
Mike Golden Spoofs
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WRITTEN BY: Mike Golden
TECHNICAL ASSISTANCE: Karl Stahmer
INTRO BY: joesmaname
Let that be Your Last Battlefield
"It looks just like one of our shuttlecraft."
"Bring it aboard."
"Captain, Myrtle says you shouldn't do that. Her horoscope says to beware of strangers." "Now loading old footage of shuttlecraft landing on the hanger deck."
"He was still unconscious when he was brought in so I gave him a sedative." "Interesting. Half black, half white. He must truly be his own worst enemy."
"You people are weird looking."
"I know you are but what am I?"
"Mr. Spock, I just remembered reading that there is a severe labor problem on Giena II. I wonder. . . ." "Greetings, captain."
"Somebody call Batman. The Riddler's on the loose again."
::Oh, come on. You knew it was coming.::
"Hmm, these smelling salts don't seem to be working." "That could be the guy I'm looking for. Hard to be sure."
"Don't laugh at my ears." "Just settle back. No one's going to laugh at your ears."
"Even though they are unusually big."
"WAH!"
MEANWHILE. . .
"SHUT UP! Shut up, you snotty-nosed brat or I swear I'm going to. . . !"
"Stop! We'll have none of that on my ship."
"A slight power fluctuation. Switch on power cell B. Reroute overflow through conduit J-12." "How did we get on the bridge?"
"Look deeply into my eyes. This is a good parody. You like this parody. You will bestow rave reviews of this parody everywhere you go. You will feel guilty about reading it for free and send me $50." "I will send you $50." "AH!"
"You could have asked to use our facilities." "Aye. Or ya could just hold it for three years the way I do." "At the tone the stardate will be 5730.25."
::BEEP::
"There's no heat coming from this furnace." "I'm a-callin' you out, pardner." "I will not let you pull my finger."
"You have to learn to get along. You have so much in common. You both look good in tights." "Say, wha?"
"Weird."
"They have both beamed down to the planet." "Let's get the hell out of here before they decide to come back."