Mike Golden Spoofs
WRITTEN BY: Mike Golden
INTRO BY: joesmaname
The Omega Glory
"That's the strangest looking moon I've ever seen."
"It almost looks like another ship, sir."
"Let's see. We were facing the same direction on the Enterprise and now we're facing different directions. Hmm." "Who's got a straw or a dollar bill we can roll up?"
"Bones, what do you make of this?" "He's dead, Jim." "Hold on. I've never seen a public execution before."
"It's like looking in a mirror." "This is what you get for wearing a red shirt." "Hey! What the. . . ?"
"Hope you don't mind. There aren't any toilets on this planet." "Captain Tracy, I believe we are entitled to one phone call." "Mmm! Who get him first?"
"Ow, lady!" "You certainly have a way with
women, captain."
"You want zug-zug? Why you not say so?"
"I've still got it." "But, can you keep it to yourself?" "Smells good."
"It delicacy from Poontang Province. The food, too."
"Who keeps doing that?" "Okay, Kirk. This is the part of the story where we fight." "Here now, you two. That's enough."
"You getum room." "If I had a dollar for everytime I've been tied up. . . ."
"Damn it, Jim. Not now."
"We will now recite the Pledge of Allegiance. The one that does not mention God."
"This treatment for screenplay I wrote. Want to hear?" "I think the answer is, 'yes'." "I want that lead role, Tracy."
"You're going to have to fight me for it, Kirk."
"Damn, Kirk. Don't you ever bathe?" "Alright, you can have the role." "Now that I'm going to be a celebrity, I'm going to have to learn to backstab my friends."
"It would be an honor, sir."