RIP-Factor
StarCrap
RIP-Factor
Mike Golden Spoofs
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WRITTEN BY: Mike Golden
TECHNICAL ASSISTANCE: Karl Stahmer
INTRO BY: joesmaname
Requim for Methusala
"Wow, look at the color scheme of this planet." "Somebody likes blue." "Uh oh, the planet's blown a fuse."
"What's that?" "I don't know but it looks vaguely familiar." "Crush, kill, destroy. Crush, kill, destroy."
"I love this show." "That Captain Kirk is such a hunk." "I wish he was here right now. The first thing I'd do is rip his shirt properly. Paramount doesn't know how to do it right."
"I've got something to tell you. You might want to sit down." "Check it out. He's got Jack Daniel's."
"Well, uncork that sumbitch."
"Mmm, you can really taste the cool, clear Tennessee spring water."
"Yeah, okay." "Gentlemen." "Who came in?"
"This is Rayna." "I'd like to get ahold of that." "She looks healthy."
"I wonder how far she can calculate the value of pi."
"I'll send my sentry out to try and score some stuff for us." "Here, captain, let me show you how to get your balls in the hole." "I like the way he handles his stick."
"May I rip your shirt?" "No, but you can kiss me." "That's not what I asked for."
"Hey, do you have a wire loose or something." "Crush, kill, destroy. You can not escape. I will kill you now, Captain Kirk." ****We'll return to our story in a moment. Just wanted to take this opportunity to remind you that reruns of the parodies can be found at: www.funnybone.netfirms.com
Now, back to our adventure.
"That was the most amazing thing I've ever seen. Thank you for saving my life." "I want you so bad." "Do her. Do her. Do her."
"Cap'n, we're being attacked by a 40 foot William Shatner."
"Get the ship out of there."
"Oh, yes!" "Oh, James!"
"She's dead, Jim." "Are you ill, captain?" "No, you don't seem to have a fever. Maybe you just need some rest."
"Damn super glue."