Mike Golden Spoofs
WRITTEN BY: Mike Golden
INTRO BY: joesmaname
Is There No Truth in Beauty?
"Nice grip. Do you workout?"
"Just my right hand."
"Jim, my future's so bright I gotta wear shades."
"Peace." "Attention all crewmembers. We have a guest on board but no one is allowed to open her box. Only Mr. Spock will have that pleasure." "Wo, you have an awesome box."
"Captain, I must say you are the most handsome man I've ever seen." "I'm talented, too. Would you like to see a magic trick?" "Do the one where you shove the wine glass up your butt."
"Tada!" "That was amazing!"
"Now, if the good doctor would assist me. Wouldn't want to sneeze right now." "I so want to see the inside of your box."
"Suit yourself."
"AH! My eyes! It burns! It burns!"
"I'm just going to turn my back for a moment and ignore any unauthorized personnel." "Nice place to hide your stash, Spock. I never would have thought to look here." "WOW! The colors!"
"Helm, where are we?" "Boldly going where no man has gone before." "Nobody likes a smartass, Mr. Chekov."
"I've got to see inside your box." "No." "Please."
"Captain Kirk wishes me to convey
his regret at his earlier outburst and asks if he may come in."
"How about I look inside your box and tell the captain about it?"
"Oh, alright. Make it snappy."
"That was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."
"You're a genius. We NEVER would have thought to turn around and go back the way we came." "Don't look at it without your shades!" "I'm ready for my close up, Mr. De Mille."
"I don't know what's in her box but it smells like something crawled up inside it and died." "Hey, sweet cheeks. How about you groove on up to my pad so we can get down to some serious amour du jour? Oh, yeah." "He got in my box and I got this shaft with the rose bud on top. I think it was a fair trade."