Mike Golden Spoofs
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|WRITTEN BY: Mike Golden
TECHNICAL ASSISTANCE: Karl Stahmer
INTRO BY: joesmaname
|Is There No Truth in Beauty?
|"Nice grip. Do you workout?"
"Just my right hand."
|"Jim, my future's so bright I gotta wear shades."|
|"Peace."||"Attention all crewmembers. We have a guest on board but no one is allowed to open her box. Only Mr. Spock will have that pleasure."||"Wo, you have an awesome box."|
|"Captain, I must say you are the most handsome man I've ever seen."||"I'm talented, too. Would you like to see a magic trick?"||"Do the one where you shove the wine glass up your butt."|
|"Tada!"||"That was amazing!"|
|"Now, if the good doctor would assist me. Wouldn't want to sneeze right now."||"I so want to see the inside of your box."
|"AH! My eyes! It burns! It burns!"|
|"I'm just going to turn my back for a moment and ignore any unauthorized personnel."||"Nice place to hide your stash, Spock. I never would have thought to look here."||"WOW! The colors!"|
|"Helm, where are we?"||"Boldly going where no man has gone before."||"Nobody likes a smartass, Mr. Chekov."|
|"I've got to see inside your box."||"No."||"Please."
|"Captain Kirk wishes me to convey
his regret at his earlier outburst and asks if he may come in."
|"How about I look inside your box and tell the captain about it?"
"Oh, alright. Make it snappy."
|"That was the most beautiful thing I've ever seen."|
|"You're a genius. We NEVER would have thought to turn around and go back the way we came."||"Don't look at it without your shades!"||"I'm ready for my close up, Mr. De Mille."|
|"I don't know what's in her box but it smells like something crawled up inside it and died."||"Hey, sweet cheeks. How about you groove on up to my pad so we can get down to some serious amour du jour? Oh, yeah."||"He got in my box and I got this shaft with the rose bud on top. I think it was a fair trade."|