Mike Golden Spoofs
WRITTEN BY: Mike Golden
INTRO BY: joesmaname
The Wink of an Eye
"Captain, if that's for me tell them I'm not here." "One girl and four guys. No wonder she's calling for help." "She's very beautiful and very HOT."
"Where have all the people gone?"
"Long time passing, captain."
"Ensign, adjust your antenna. You're starting to fade." "Scotty, could you come to the bridge? My chair is stuck on rotate."
"Is not."
"I bet he is. Look at that choker he's wearing."
"Hold it. I think something just pinched my ass." "Well, your heart's beating as it should so you're not crazy."
"Did you hear that buzzing sound?
The last time I heard something like that was on the bridge just before we met Khan."
"Check it out. I AM THE UNKNOWN CAPTAIN." "Here comes the captain."
"You two stay right where you are."
"The main say, hang loose, baby".
"Where did that come from, Spock?"
"I hope there aren't any disgruntled crewmen working in the mess hall."
"Aye, that's a pretty l'ass." "Finally, a good-looking man that's as fast as I am."
"We sent out a scout to try and find help but he never came back." "Kewl! You're going to shoot me in the head. Don't miss." "Let's do the Time Warp again."
"Say, do either of you know how to Madison?"
"If I told the captain once, I told him a thousand times. When you go to a foreign planet, don't drink the water." "I burnt my wittle finger."
"Shh! Mommy will kiss it and make it all better."
"You the man. I will love you always."
"You the man. I will love you always."
"I know."
"Is there room for one more, honey?" "I think that's an excellent idea."
"She's going to blow, captain."
"Yes. At least, she was before you showed up."
"Hold it, Scotty. Damn, I look good today."
"Well, I got me some, Spock. I won't bore you with the details. Let's just say that I got it in the Wink of An Eye."